Tuesday, 5 June 2018

The beautiful voice

Hi! Long time no see. Been writing another post about a college trip for more than a year yet unable to complete because it was having a pessimistic effect on me and it was dragging me down to move any further to write about the other things that happened afterwards. I guess procrastination and Zeigarnik effect is a lethal combination for a blogger. This recent incident I am about to describe was more powerful enough for me that it enabled me to share it after so many months of my dissonance to writing. Glad it happened. Blessed I am posting a new one after months. 

So! I started working for a US based not for profit organisation like a month ago. Work life is fine and routine started to seep in. I take local buses to reach my workplace. The evening time when I take the bus back home, it is usually crowded and you will hope that the journey ends soon. This one time when I took the bus on such occasion, I met a speech impaired women standing beside me. In crowded local buses usually the money is passed between the person next to you to get your tickets. Crowded means in the bus where you gotta grab the metal poles like a kid hanging over a monkey bars, where there is no place even for the exhaled air to move out, where people do acrobatic hanging nearby to the door and sometimes where your money gets lost in all this chaos and people forgot whose ticket they have received or who gave how much money to pass it to the bus conductor.

This person who is speech impaired fascinated me. Even though she wasn't able to do much she did put all her effort on passing on the money and tickets enthusiastically. She communicated more than all of us to help each other to get a bus ticket. The hand gestures, the sportive smile and her firm grip of not tripping over a strong thud the bus does during twists and turns. All of it, mesmerized me. She was contagious. Everyone who had a crinkle on their forehead, tiredness in their eyes, irritated in their minds were affected by her. She brought a delicate smile to all those around her. Everyone were calm, relaxed and observing her telling her thoughts out through her gestures. She was basically complaining about the crowd, people, sweat, and much more. Even though it was about nothing, it felt nice to know about it in an unusual way. 

I have seen her couple of times before but only now I got the courage to speak with her. I was super intrigued by her. At first I didn't knew how to talk to her and what if it is too creepy to approach her as a stranger in a crowded bus. Later she initiated a conversation with me. Half the time I didn't understand what she was talking about. But it looked like listening to an interesting folklore through a puppetry show. It was interesting to know how many body language cues we miss and notice only if we come across people who are impaired to talk, see and hear. She started the conversation by telling about Double Decker buses at her native. How they are so amazing with double the capacity for people to transport. I asked her about where she is from? She said Surat, Gujarat with elaborate mouth movements. Then I asked her can she hear me? using my hand gestures. She says yes by nodding her head.

I said oh that's awesome. Then we had a long pause. Because I wanted to ask her what work or career she in but afraid about what if its a sensitive question and such question might hurt her. But after multiple eager yet anxious mental questioning I braced myself to ask her. I showed her a hand gesture like typing in a computer and writing to indicate work. She tried to say but it sounded feeble gibberish for me to interpret. I gave a confused pause. She mouths back as in audit. So she does auditing as her career. It surprised me to know her impairment didn't define her self esteem to pursue such a career. I then was trying to tell her I am bad at math. She didn't understand. I tried to indicate math by gesturing counting number by fingers but it confused her even more. She jokingly gestures about texting and calling to tell me what happened to my phone, nowadays everyone has one right! 

Oh, Right! I can type a text to know what she means to tell. I make a small smack to my forehead to indicate that I didn't thought about it. Well unusual communication need unusual thinking and in return we get unusual learning. 

I took out my phone from my bag over it's squished self from people around the crowded bus and opened notes widget. I typed "I am bad at math" She gestured to disagreed by swaying her head and indicated, if you practice you will get it. How nice of her! Then, I typed "What is your name?" She typed "Nikita" I was in a daze of thinking to tell her how people misspell the names in Government documents. Before I could tell she said the same thing in gestures. Funny how coincidence works. She also said some call her Nikeeta, and some say Nikhitha, Neeekeeta, etc but rarely the right way of pronouncing her name. No matter what impairment be there, the feeling of getting our names mispronounced is too obvious and interesting to see from her expressions. She asked me by gesturing "What about your name?" I typed "Sunayana" And "Yes. People mispronounce it at most of the times"

We nodded to agreement like a Tanjore doll as a sign of silent chuckles. Then she luckily got seated as a few people started to depart to their destinations. She asked me to give her my bag to hold it for me as she got seated but I was like that's alright and courteous and stuff. But I did ended up giving her my bag because concerns happen and my arm ligaments did started to have a Nocebo effect when she told me isn't your bag heavy to hold and difficult for you to stand for a long time. She asked me where do you get down at? I told her my destination and she gave a smirk and gestured that's where even she has to get off. We were smiling for a while and then started gazing into the outside world through the momentum of the bus and it's dusty glass window panes. When our stop was about to come, she even advised me to be careful with my bag that the crowd are always in a hurry and they might tend to make you fall and all. So much consideration even my own grandparents never showered upon me. 

We got down to our stop, said our goodbyes to each other and parted our ways on the opposite sides.
One good incident has a power to move you and uplift from your past miseries. It's okay to take time to get healed and revive. For me it happened after months, because everyone has problems and issues but the depth of it takes time the further it has ingrained into our minds. Unravel yourself from such clutches as soon as possible and appreciate small things in life. I would have never anticipated to talk with a speech impaired person in a crowded bus but above all the noise we communicated.

Advice corner: If you are curious about something, do try or learn about it. Life is never disappointing, it's our mindset that we choose to live determines a happy or sad life.

And! Huge news! I am not a college student anymore. Officially entered the career world. Thus change in tagline.


Bye-Bye to my college self and hello to Adulting!